69 replies to this topic

[DontClipMyWings]

I'm not saying that Amy's parents don't love her-- I would never, because I'm not that arrogant and I know that's not the case. What I am saying is that you have to make someone WANT to do it. They have to REALLY see how much they have to lose if they don't get themselves together. I mean, sure, Amy's career isn't the best right now, and her relationship with Blake disbanded, but does she truly realise that it happened because of the drugs? Does she realize that she can't have both things-- music and drugs, family and drugs, good friends and drugs, etc? Of course someone has to want to help themselves. But there's no reason the people close to her can't make helping herself seem like a much better alternative to whatever they propose.

If nothing else, Amy should at least be in some mandatory intense therapy, because she's not herself and she's not seeing clearly.

I know your not saying they dont love her but belive me ive gone through it in my own family, a drug/alcohol addicted person is so wrapped up in their little world and routeen of addiction that they can see no further than that, if they dont want help you simply cant help them you can sit for hours and hours endlessly trying to get them to realise what their doing to themselves but its almost as if the addiction blinds them to the real world, the feeling of addiction overules most other things which is why many drug addicts steal from family to get a fix because the fix means more than anything to them. Mitch and janis have had to put up with this heartache for ages now i dont blame them for realising that she has to want it for it to happen.

[pearljo]

She really needs Polysporin on that finger. I know this is the nose thread but this other stuff will jump up and get ya'.

[Alan48]

other pics showing that the "white powder" only appears when that area of skin is perpendicular to the light source: http://photos.tmz.co...s_it_old_school

[shaylaxtx]

other pics showing that the "white powder" only appears when that area of skin is perpendicular to the light source: http://photos.tmz.co...s_it_old_school

those pictures are even more worrisome. you can see white powder caked around both of her nostrils in all the pictures.

[pearljo]

Bullshit. The way she's crashed in the car shows she had a few too many. She's not tweaked out of her skull.

The sky ain't falling, OK?

If Amy does fall, there will be no doubt.

Let it go.

[Lainey]

Well, it wouldn't exactly be a huge shock to anyone if she did take cocaine that night (if, in fact she did). Plenty of people relapse. The important thing is that she is making some, slight, progress - albeit in baby steps.

She's looking 100 times better than she did a year ago.

The fact that she was able to go out last night, looking bloody well good and staying upright and having what appeared to me to be an early dinner with some friends then calling it quits - well, I'll take that as a good sign.

Rome wasn't built in a day.

[DontClipMyWings]

Well, it wouldn't exactly be a huge shock to anyone if she did take cocaine that night (if, in fact she did). Plenty of people relapse. The important thing is that she is making some, slight, progress - albeit in baby steps.

She's looking 100 times better than she did a year ago.

The fact that she was able to go out last night, looking bloody well good and staying upright and having what appeared to me to be an early dinner with some friends then calling it quits - well, I'll take that as a good sign.

Rome wasn't built in a day.

Couldnt of put it better myself! Everyone relapses and amys done so well to go this long without a relapse, this wont be the last time it will happen so we need to get used to it! She'll get there in the end.

[mister magic]

I feel like everyone is getting unnecessarily defensive on Amy's behalf-- I wasn't criticising her for having relapsed if that's what happened, but rather I was saying that the chances for relapses like this would be greatly lessened if she were given ACTUAL help by those around her. Let's face it, drug addicts don't just up and quit on their own, just because they can. If it were that simple, there wouldn't be any addicts in the world. Sure, relapses are par for the course, especially for those who have been through a rehab program. Amy hasn't. She's trying to do everything cold-turkey without any work on her mental health with a trained specialist. She's not superman, and it's not disrespectful towards her, or even overly harsh, to say that she ought to really be pushed into getting some therapy.

In any case, I feel you Lainey. She's looking AMAZING these days- so, so much better than those scary days from a year ago. I love Amy, and want to see her get well. It'll always be a struggle to retain that line, probably for the rest of her life, but she's smart and was at one time very self-possessed and very aware of (and protective of) her own self-worth. I just want to see her get back to that place. To that Amy that doesn't take any shit because she knows she deserves so much more.

[Lainey]

I feel like everyone is getting unnecessarily defensive on Amy's behalf-- I wasn't criticising her for having relapsed if that's what happened, but rather I was saying that the chances for relapses like this would be greatly lessened if she were given ACTUAL help by those around her.

I agree with you, mister magic, and honestly, I did not think you were criticizing Amy at all. I never thought that for one minute. I enjoy your posts very much!

I do agree that she needs help - but only she can come to that decision. I've never thought for one minute that she doesn't (need help). I'm just not surprised that she's relapsed, and if she did take cocaine that night, then I can understand why she has. She's used drugs and alcohol as a coping mechanism for a long time, and I'm just not surprised that it's taking a while - especially given the traumatic experience of the end of her marriage. The thought of sobriety probably scares the heck out of her. It must be like walking a tightrope without a safety net.

I hope that she finally sees the light, and I have faith that she will - eventually. I think she knows what she has to do. At least I hope she does!

I take my hat off to everyone who has the strength to conquer their addictions. It's got to be incredibly hard.

[WinehouseFAN08]

Pray everything is okay..
Good news.. we solved a mistery.. the freckles are still there I think they where real.

[Winehousedrunk]

Yes, the thing about her nose that we can now finally say with reasonable certainty, is that the freckles are indeed real, which is definitely good news, and I am also happy with the nose in its entirety, and with the face whereupon it is located.;-)

[Laul]

I doubt that Amy's parents think that all her problems can be blamed on other people. It may get reported that way in the tabloids, but her parents are smarter than that. Mitch may get angry at Blake, but I bet he gets angry at Amy too, we just don't see it because it happens behind closed doors. Her parents are under such stress, because they love her, that it's not surprising that they would criticize someone who's making things worse for Amy or complicating her recovery.

I think her parents have tried very hard to help her--in multiple ways, including "tough love"--but she just hasn't cooperated a lot. If she doesn't agree to get help, and she can't legally be forced to get help, what can do they do? That's the quandary they've been in most of the time.

Let me set something straight here, Mitch and Janis are and always will be the blame of Amy downfall. This all started at 9 years old when she would disrespect Janis by swearing at her, throwing things at her calling her awful things etc... evidently this lead to her getting into a wrong crowd and this is where she found srugs. Fame and Blake are just adding to her already troubled self and homelife and her longing to be seen, heard and LOVED. I makes me so angry the way Mitch noly now decides to give Amy attention after all these years! and Jnis is a weak mother always has been when it came to Amy and they havent done enough for her ever.
the only person that can really help her now is Alex. He is and always has been her role model, but he needs to step up instead of rolling his eyes.
I love this girl with everything i have but i cant let people write about how her parents have tried to help.

[pearljo]

My mom and stepfather would have made Mitch and Janis look like Beaver Cleavers parents.

Amy's parents weren't the most dysfunctional in the world or even on their block. Amy doesn't like weakness in others and can spot it, and will exploit it.

Amy also has a bullshitometer and will rebel when she spots it.

Mitch and Janis weren't perfect: no parents are. But where I would swallow my pain and anger to try to keep the peace, Amy would say this is bullshit and I don't think any parent could have stopped it.

Amy will one day realize how great her parents really were. I think she already knows but just doesn't have the emotional vocabulary to say it. We'll know the song when she writes it though.

I think maybe the best thing, in the end, is to not point fingers. I think we might all pray to surround the whole family with love and light. Just like we should do for each other, because we'll all face similar problems one day.

[Winehousedrunk]

Let me set something straight here, Mitch and Janis are and always will be the blame of Amy downfall. This all started at 9 years old when she would disrespect Janis by swearing at her, throwing things at her calling her awful things etc... evidently this lead to her getting into a wrong crowd and this is where she found srugs. Fame and Blake are just adding to her already troubled self and homelife and her longing to be seen, heard and LOVED. I makes me so angry the way Mitch noly now decides to give Amy attention after all these years! and Jnis is a weak mother always has been when it came to Amy and they havent done enough for her ever.
the only person that can really help her now is Alex. He is and always has been her role model, but he needs to step up instead of rolling his eyes.
I love this girl with everything i have but i cant let people write about how her parents have tried to help.

Your view on reasons for Amy's troubles is very interesting, as it seems to come from a place of some real background knowledge and a deeper understanding of, and clear affection for, Amy; for all that, it still is hard to believe that Amy's parents could be blamed for her troubles to the extent that your post suggests. But maybe you're right, which would be sad. Yet, the imperfection of the world and our lives can be shocking, but no surprise. Amy's imperfections are just very, very famous. People should support her, knowing here failed emotional history. Phil said some good stuff above that covers what more I could've said about it at this point.

[mister magic]

it still is hard to believe that Amy's parents could be blamed for her troubles to the extent that your post suggests

I think what Laul is trying to say is that Amy's problems aren't something that sprouted from nowhere, or that started up just cos she met Blake- Amy was predisposed to behaviour like this. It was a longstanding pattern, since she was a child, and her parents failed to correct it when it was in its earliest stages. They let her run wild and do what she wanted-- and to say that because Amy is strong-willed that she couldn't have been stopped is silly, I think. It's no surprise that Amy's tendency towards doing whatever she wants, when she wants, without being aware of (or failing to care about) the consequences finally manifested in a problem that overtook HER, rather than the other way around.

Of course, by the time Amy reached her late teenage years, the window for correcting her behaviour was long over. I don't think Mitch and Janis are necessarily to be blamed, but it certainly helps to understand Amy's current problems if you can get to the root of them.

I love Amy, and I say all of this as someone who loves her, but her behaviour is and has been out of control for a long while. While I think it's wonderful that she's started to straighten her act up a bit, she clearly hasn't entirely-- she still drinks heavily, and despite all that's happened, she still wants to get back with Blake. I don't know what else could happen to smack her in the face with the reality of the fact that being with him would be her downfall, probably for the final time-- clearly nothing has gotten through to her yet. It seems to me her self-destructive tendencies have overtaken all of her other tendencies towards self-preservation and self-worth. And that's what's truly worrying.

I've said it before and I've said it again (that's right, Marisa, we're still talking about this, haha)-- Amy needs some SERIOUS therapy. But for all the wonderful qualities that Amy has, I just don't know that she's capable of the kind of self-analysis and self-care necessary to truly correct all of her behaviour at the moment. I recommended previously that someone stage an intervention type thing with her, but I almost feel like even that wouldn't work, because it's been left far, far too long.